The Shark!

Featuring Agents: Arnold, Karpinos, Todd, Keech
And further help from: Charles Roche, Matt Mercer, Corey Cicci, and Grant Austin

On Friday, September 28, 2001 the University of North Carolina campus was stricken with danger. The danger of a shark attack. You heard right, a shark attack. Most UNC students and faculty go about their everyday lives with a sort of smug, “shark attacks could never happen to me” attitude. The agents of Improv Everywhere proved to the community the danger of their wishful thinking. By land or by sea, sharks pose a threat to us all.

Improv Everywhere Mission
“Help! There is a shark chasing us!”
The Shark began his attack as he emerged from Lenoir dining hall, chasing agents Karpinos and Todd through the center of the UNC campus. “Shark! Look out everyone! There is a shark behind us! He’s coming this way!”

Improv Everywhere Mission
“Someone stop that shark!
After one lap around the building, The Shark became out-numbered. IE associate Charles Roche joining the struggle to save the campus from the deadly teeth of The Shark. Trying to keep up with the beast, the men shouted to the students around them, “Stop that shark! Please, he ate one of our friends! Don’t let that shark get away!”. The men demanded justice be served to The Shark and were not going to allow the brutal eating of their friend, Walker, to go unnoticed.

Improv Everywhere Mission
“Where’s Walker, Shark?!”
The team of vigilantes continued to grow as IE associates Matt Mercer and Grant Austin joined the crusade. Using large sticks and steel chairs, the men were able to corner The Shark and interrogate him in the public view. The Shark refused to give the men any information on their missing friend. Agent Todd tried to rally the growing crowd of UNC students to “take a stand against Sharks on campus”. His battle cries were met with confusion and, oddly, laughter.

Improv Everywhere Misison
The Shark makes it to Franklin St.
Using his brute force and animal instincts, The Shark was able to escape and head north to Franklin St., the so-called “main drag” of Chapel Hill. In the process of his escape, The Shark attacked Mercer and stripped him of his left arm. Mercer was escorted to the hospital by IE associate Corey Cicci in excruciating pain. Now on their own, agents Karpinos and Todd had to keep the civilians on Franklin St. safe from the blood-thirsty shark.

Improv Everywhere Mission
The Shark attacks The Gap!
The Shark began his attack on Franklin St. stores, rushing past the agents and into The Gap. Karpinos and Todd were able to take control of the situation before it was too late. The Shark continued to invade other businesses, with the IE agents dragging him back to the streets every time.

 

 

Improv Everywhere Mission Improv Everywhere Misison
The Shark invades Sephora. The Shark points to his home in STA Travel
Improv Everywhere Mission Improv Everywhere Misison
The Shark in C.O. Copies. IE Agents were forced to pay $0.07 for this.

 

After his attacks on Franklin St., The Shark made his way back to the lower quad of the UNC campus. It was there, in front of a large crowd of students, that agent Keech entered the scene and made the final tackle needed to squash The Shark

Improv Everywhere Mission
Keech takes down The Shark
Improv Everywhere Mission
The Shark taps out
During Keech’s struggle, The Shark’s head was torn off, revealing that there was more to this case than the agents had suspected. It was Old Man Arnold in a shark costume the whole time!

Improv Everywhere Mission
“I would have gotten away with it had it
not been for those meddling kids!”
Other highlights:

  • The Shark visits Davis library. IE agents whisper, “Help! There is a shark in the library and he is chasing us!”
  • The Shark hides in Kerr Drugs reading a “Guns Monthly” magazine. Customer helps IE agents locate shark by yelling, “Aisle 4! He’s on Aisle 4!”
  • Man on street looks at The Shark and remarks, “Dude, I thought I was f*cked up.”

IE agents saved the day again! Chapel Hill citizens are now free to live their lives away from the fear of shark attacks. For now.

Mission accomplished.

Comments

  1. Hilarious! Just seeing the costume itself makes me break out in laugher. A bunch of people in the computer lab are looking at me weird now.

  2. As a UNC Chapel Hill student, I wish you had done that a year later, while I was there. Come back any time though!

  3. Holy Crud! That shark lives like right next to my house!

    Sean (from Australia, specifically the part of australia right next to where the shark was pointing)

  4. I can’t stop laughing! That is funny stuff. I love the guys whispering about being chased by the shark in the library. Man I’m laughing again. I gotta go pee.

  5. I’m just trying to imagine how I would react if a shark ran after some random dudes on the street in front of me… The scene is purely hilarious, and has a spontaneous absurd genius. Good job, I watched a lot of your skits, you guys are GREAT!

  6. Dude, rock on. I got linked to IE by RealLife comics, and I am pleased to say that this site exceeds my hopes! IE forever, man!

  7. As a current tarheel, I have to formally thank Improv Everywhere and their constant vigilance in protecting future generations of Tarheels from shark attacks. I can confidently say that I never fear a Shark Attack when I’m sitting in the lower quad on a sunny day and–well–it’s all because of you guys.

  8. Aw, How come there aren’t any improv everywhere skits in Chapel Hill anymore? I would love to participate in any if they were here. they all seem to be in NYC or Washington D.C. now.

  9. I would love to be in one of these. If you do another one in Chapel Hill let me know if you need someone, and i will surely help out! I am very thankful that you saved Chapel Hill from the shark! I would hate to see it eat some of my friends!!!

  10. Coincidentally – sharks home seems to be around Brisbane (aka Bris-Vegas) in Queensland… which has a suburb called Chapel Hill!!

    Sharks are fairly common in Moreton Bay, QLD, so good on you for making people aware, and ensuring the safety of all those uni students!!

  11. That is great. I think you should also have had an octopus or something running around with the people, saying “He ate my family! and three of my legs!” or something like that. :)

  12. :) Beautiful. The part that had me laughing out loud and giggling uncontrollably: “IE Agents were forced to pay $0.07 for this.” The ultimate injustice! Having to pay for your enemy’s crime!

  13. In a way, these early IE missions are the best ever. Sure, Food Court Musical and Frozen Grand Central are amazing, but these early ones have me laughing so much harder. Especially these two shark series ones. Safety Shark was pure comedic gold, confronting drunk people on the streets, and the shark attack on UNC campus and downtown New York City stores are great. I especially love how he scanned his head, and I’m sorry to hear that you noble agents had to pay for his dastardly crimes and illegal copy-making.

  14. Haha, very amusing. You can tell how old this mission is by the fact that the Gap and Sephora haven’t existed on Franklin Street for quite a few years now. As a Chapel Hill native and current UNC-CH student, please IE, consider coming do another mission on campus!

  15. It would be funny if you did something like this again except with pac man and ghosts running around and chasing each other.

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